Dishwasher and Indian women

Prescript:

Usha said: சமையல் அறை சிங்கில் பாத்திரங்கள் எப்பொழுதும் தேய்க்க குவிந்துக் கொண்டே இருந்தன

I said: dishwasher is my best friend!

Usha said: டிஷ் வாஷர், ரிப்பேராகி ஒருவருஷம் ஆச்சு. ஆமாம் எல்லாத்தையும் தேச்சி அதில் போடணும், அதுக்கு கையிலேயே உடனடியாய் கழுவுவது சுலபமாய் இருக்கு.

I said: //எல்லாத்தையும் தேச்சி அதில் போடணும்//

எதுக்கு? நாங்கள் அப்படியே போடுவோம்.  🙂

Usha said: பிரேமலதா, டிஷ் வாஷ்ர் வேலை உங்க தலைவருடையதா:-))))))))))))
————————-

When Usha smiled at length in that comment,

  1. I didn’t get why she thinks it is balan who operates the dishwasher

  2. why she doesn’t want to believe that we can dump the dishes straight in

  3. what is there to be smiling at length about (even if it is balan who operates the bloody machine (don’t ask me. there is a big hallahulla about operating that bloody machine in my household) )?

  4. do men smile at length if they say “my wife works and brings salary”?

  5. i am totally surprised that do we still have to talk in these terms? is it true that we are all living in that situation stillllllllllll? Am I living a different life in a different world?

  1. Similar questions came up when there was a female-bloggers-meet in London sometime ago that most of the time they were interested in talking about mother in law issues and how we “have to” give birth to “male” child. etc.. 

  2. The question that really made me think was that “in Desi parties women stay in corner/kitchen and talk about cooking while men stay in another corner/lounge and talk about politcs/cricket”!    No, that is not true in those Desi parties I have been to, except the ones I have been to in my early days in this country. I would exclude those parties totally, as there was a generation gap there (yes, some people are older than me, I am not the only or the oldie in this world).

  1. Am I living in a different world?

  2. In our social circle, invariably it is men who clean the house. In many houses men clean the dishes, except in those houses where women complain about not-cleaning-well by the men. 🙂

  3. I am not saying that I don’t see any MCPs at all, in fact, most of them are either MCPs or still have not thought a lot about these issues, so they continue to live how their previous generations have lived. Still they do not think doing household things is any big revolutionary thing they are doing (definitely do not talk in terms of “I am helping my wife”). It is not talked about as a biggie in my circle. Mind you, many girls are not working women.

  4. I do not know much about mother in law issues, as many families here do not have one at home and I certainly do not have one in my life at all (Hope she is doing great in Trichy). Although in that bloggers-meet I tried to say in the same lines as others,  just in an attempt to join the conversation as I found myself quiet and not involved in any of those topics they have been talking about, I have not had any MIL experience myself, good or bad for that matter, with my MIL at all.

  5. “Male child” issue I observed in only one family, but I would believe it exists very much though not visibly there (I have not inlcuded elders implying that the child should be made male-child. I am only talking about the couple themselves. I totally agree that elders do create problems). But, I would think it is mostly to do with “difficulties in bringing up a girl child in these days”, meaning, “I don’t mind if my child is a boy and goes on to have sex in his life at a later time, but i don’t think I can live with a fact that my child is a girl and will have sex when she grows up and I am scared that she might eventually end up having sex”… It is not even dowry these days.

  1.   Dishwasher:

    1. We do rinse (not wash) before stacking the dishes in the dishwasher. But, that is what we always did when we washed them in the sink by ourselves. So, I do feel my dishwasher takes a quite a good load off me.

    2. We both operate dishwasher.

    3. I have observed many indians do not like dishwasher claiming that it doesn’t clean well. I totally disagree. Dishwasher cleans better than me. (and I clean better than those women who complain against dishwasher. true). Didn’t same trend prevail when pressure cooker was introduced, washing machine was introduced, mixie was introduced, why, when electrically operated (?!!!) grinder was introduced? Indian women love to stay the way they are. Newton’s first law.

  2.  Desi parties

    1. It is a welcoming trend that I see in this younger generation that they are quite open and very forward about how they have naturally changed. No feminism was needed there. (No feminism works there either).

    2. Men take pride in their “drinking” wives..  No. I am not supporting alchoholism, I am pleasantly surprised to see them having overcome a stigma, a strong one at that.

    3. men do not talk about politics or cricket in desi parties. It is always about something hilarious (how their driving skills were, how they went crazy, how they drove first, how they went wrong with maps etc. etc.) that happened.. enjoyable for everyone.

    4.  We all sit in the lounge. Most men discourage their wives cooking for their guests and order pizza (if women go to kitchen/cooking how will we “all” enjoy the get-together, is the question those men have asked whenever we nice ladies have offered to cook something quick).

    5. Yes, still some kitchen talks happen, but it is mostly to do with exchanging recipies as most girls do not know proper cooking before coming here. Men do better in that department these days, as they have lived by themselves for sometime before marriage.

I think I have missed a lot and I suspect I do not make any sense in this post. Can’t be bothered to check it now, as I have to go out to buy some bloody good shoes as it is bleeding cold here  😦

(This weekend was supposed to be a blog-free-weekend. I have stayed away from Tamil blogging at least. Well, almost.  😦  )

Advertisements

7 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Trackback: Dishwasher and Indian women « கோம்பை
  2. dharumi
    Nov 12, 2006 @ 16:02:57

    going thru your articel was more like peeping into a ‘desi party in a phoren land’ and also a little into your head. 🙂

    Reply

  3. Premalatha
    Nov 12, 2006 @ 16:06:27

    Dharumi,
    :))
    thenormalself is meant to give a great deal into my head, including to myself.
    read more. you will see. 🙂
    (normalself is the blog i seem to be regularly updating).

    Reply

  4. phantom363
    Nov 13, 2006 @ 20:43:24

    hi, i am the humble dishwasher in my household. except on occassions, when i cook, the wife offers to clean the dishes. but that is not mandatory. 🙂

    it is a fact that the sink gets full quicker than you empty it. especially in my home where there are two teenagers and their everpresent friends. those youngsters do not think it is cool to wash dishes. 😦

    there is nothing wrong in washing dirty dishes. along with the dirty utensils, you can also spend the time to clean your mind of dirty thoughts 🙂

    Reply

  5. Jay
    Nov 17, 2006 @ 07:11:37

    Yeah, sometime I do think the ladies intentionally talk everything about their MIL & SIL. I guess it’s just to bond with other ladies present, with or without any issues. So lame their lives are, I think!

    Reply

  6. Premalatha
    Nov 21, 2006 @ 22:21:03

    Phantom,

    I used to have my big mobile handsome dishwasher. I have lost it to my dishwasher operator. 🙂 The old-fashioned operator, keeps hand washing certain (தோசக் கல்லு/Dosa tava) dishes claiming that dishwasher will spoil those dishes… I think it is to do with speaking tamil language rather than to do with indian-woman-thingy, whatsay? :))

    btw, your comment should appear in my main post. It is that good. thanks.

    Jay,
    Some women ARE like that, indeed lame lives. 🙂
    But some others do have real MIL/SIL issues and other issues as well.. poor them.

    Reply

  7. Jay
    Nov 24, 2006 @ 10:59:21

    But some others do have real MIL/SIL issues and other issues as well.. poor them.

    Yes, of course. That is a very delicate matter which, sadly, is without solution for some.

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: